The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy Tertiary to Quintessential Phases

The terms Tertiary Phase, Quandary Phase and Quintessential Phase describe the radio adaptations of the books Life, the Universe and Everything, So Long, and Thanks For All the Fish and Mostly Harmless recorded in 2003 and 2004 by Above the Title Productions for BBC Radio 4. These are continuations of The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy radio series, consisting of a total of fourteen episodes. They were preceded by the Primary and Secondary Phases. For more on the history of all five series, please see The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy (radio series).

The Quandary Phase

Fit the Nineteenth

• Broadcast on BBC Radio 4, 3 May 2005

:Cast:

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:* The Book: William Franklyn

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:* The Book's "Update" voice (uncredited): Rula Lenska

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:* Arthur Dent: Simon Jones

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:* Ford Prefect: Geoffrey McGivern

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:* Rob McKenna: Bill Paterson

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:* Fenchurch (Fenny): Jane Horrocks

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:* Barman: Arthur Smith

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:* Russell: Rupert Degas

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:* Vogon Guard (and Alien Teaser, uncredited): Bob Golding

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:* Stewardess: Alison Pettitt

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:* Hooker: Fiona Carew

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:* Vogon Helmsman: Michael Cule

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:* Evil-looking bird/Canis Pontiff: Chris Emmett

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:* Vogon Captain: Toby Longworth

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:* Announcer: John Marsh

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Arthur discovers that the entry for "Earth" in the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, which formerly had been edited down to "Mostly Harmless," has been replaced, with Ford's original full version. They head towards Earth independently, Arthur arriving first. After landing in a field in Somerset, Arthur tries to hike a lift to Cottington, to see if his house still exists. Along the way, he meets Rob McKenna, a man who complains about the rain, before realising he has hitched a lift the wrong way. He gets out, and gets a lift with Russell, whose sister, Fenchurch, is out cold on a back seat of the car. Arthur is instantly smitten, and asks about her. Russell claims that she is mad, and has been ever since "the hallucinations" — the Vogon Constructor Fleet.

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On the Constructor Fleet, a junior crew member notices that Earth has re-appeared. He is overridden by the captain, Jeltz, who declares that he saw it destroyed himself.

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Meanwhile, Ford is stuck in a bar with a large bill, which he avoids paying by promising to write an entry for the bar in the Guide. On the streets, he is asked by a hooker whether he is "rich", and says that he might be — being owed several years back pay for writing two words. He shows the two words — "Mostly Harmless" — to the hooker, and is shocked to see the guide updating this to his full entry. He decides to go to Earth himself.

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Fit the Twentieth

• Broadcast on BBC Radio 4, 10 May 2005

:Cast:

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:* The Book: William Franklyn

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:* Arthur Dent: Simon Jones

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:* Ford Prefect: Geoffrey McGivern

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:* Rob McKenna: Bill Paterson

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:* Fenchurch: Jane Horrocks

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:* Raffle Woman: June Whitfield

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:* BT Operator/Barmaid/News Anchor 2: Ann Bryson

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:* Jim (Bartender)/News Anchor 1: Simon Greenall

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:* Speaking Clock: Brian Cobby

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:* Ecological Man/Zirzla Leader: David Dixon

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:* Arthur's BBC Boss: Geoffrey Perkins

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:* Announcer: John Marsh

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Arthur arrives at his house, finding it undemolished and the phone ringing. He is unable to get to the phone before it rings off. The contents of the house are as he left them, apart from a large pile of junk mail just inside the front door, and a strange bowl, bearing the inscription 'So Long and Thanks for All the Fish'. He phones his boss at the BBC to explain that he has been absent due to going mad and would return to work when hedgehogs come out of hibernation.

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Driving, he encounters Fenchurch again, and gives her a lift to the train station, saying that he has something he wants to tell her. At the station pub they attempt to engage in conversation, but are interrupted by someone offering raffle tickets. Fenchurch has to leave to catch her train, and leaves her phone number on a ticket — with which Arthur then wins the raffle.

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Distraught, Arthur decides to find the Islington cave that he spent some years in during prehistoric times. He knocks on a few doors in Islington near where he thinks that cave was, firstly calling at Friends of the World. When there he attempts to make a donation to "save the dolphins" but is met with mockery from the "Ecological Man" (played by David Dixon, Ford Prefect from the television series). The next door he knocks on is Fenchurch's. She is surprised that he didn't call first, shows him his misplaced copy of the Guide, and notes that they need to talk.

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Fit the Twenty-First

• Broadcast on BBC Radio 4, 17 May 2005

:Cast:

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:* The Book: William Franklyn

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:* Arthur Dent: Simon Jones

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:* Ford Prefect: Geoffrey McGivern

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:* Fenchurch: Jane Horrocks

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:* Murray Bost Henson: Stephen Fry

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:* East River Creature: Jackie Mason

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:* Vogon Councillor: Dominic Hawksley

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:* Steward: Simon Greenall

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:* Mrs Kapelsen: Margaret Robertson

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:* Vogon Clerk: Michael Cule

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:* Prostetnic Vogon Jeltz: Toby Longworth

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:* Wonko the Sane (John Watson): Christian Slater

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:* Announcer: John Marsh

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Fenchurch tells Arthur about her revelation at the time of the Vogon fleet's visit. At her urging, Arthur figures out that her feet do not touch the ground, leading him to suspect that she also can fly, and to a romantic tryst on the wing of a Heathrow-bound airplane.

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Curious about the dolphins' fate, Arthur and Fenchurch head to California to visit Wonko the Sane, a scientist considered the foremost expert on the species. Wonko, who lives in an inside-out house called "The Outside of the Asylum" and claims to have had conversations with green-winged angels, tells Arthur and Fenchurch that they all received the same glass bowls — farewell gifts from the dolphins that, when pinged, play their final message to humans.

Related Topics:
Dolphins' - California - Wonko the Sane - Angels

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Meanwhile, a Vogon inquiry reveals that Earth's location in a plural zone means that any destroyed version is highly likely to be replaced by an alternate one. The Vogons decide that all Earths must still be destroyed, even though the bypass project has been cancelled.

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Fit the Twenty-Second

• The final episode in the adaptation of So Long, and Thanks For All the Fish.
• Broadcast on BBC Radio 4, 24 May 2005

:Cast:

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:*The Book: William Franklyn

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:*Arthur Dent: Simon Jones

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:*Ford Prefect: Geoffrey McGivern

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:*Rob McKenna: Bill Paterson

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:*Fenchurch: Jane Horrocks

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:*Tricia McMillan: Sandra Dickinson

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:*Marvin the Paranoid Android: Stephen Moore

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:*The Lajestic Vantrasheel of Lob: Bob Golding

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:*Stewardess: Alison Pettitt

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:*Speaking Clock: Brian Cobby

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:*Nick Clarke: Himself

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:*Charlotte Green: Herself

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:*Peter Donaldson: Himself

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:*Sir Patrick Moore: Himself

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:*Announcer: John Marsh

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Fenchurch and Arthur return to England, to discover that a large spaceship has landed in Knightsbridge, London, bringing Ford Prefect with it. Fenchurch, Arthur and Ford leave on the ship. Arthur begins to suspect that this is not the Earth he and Ford knew — there is a "Tricia McMillan" on the news, with an American accent and blonde hair, but otherwise identical to the Trillian who left his earth with Zaphod Beeblebrox. Fenchurch and Arthur go to see God's Final Message to His Creation, and bump into Marvin, who is also en route to see it. Marvin is now older than the universe itself, and needs assistance to read the message, which turns out to be "WE APOLOGISE FOR THE INCONVENIENCE". Declaring that he "feels pretty good" about the message, Marvin dies.

Related Topics:
England - Knightsbridge - London - Ford Prefect - Zaphod Beeblebrox - God's Final Message to His Creation

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This is followed by an event only mentioned in Mostly Harmless. Fenchurch asks Arthur to show her the universe. However, on a commercial liner flight, Fenchurch disappears, and the ship's crew deny she ever existed...

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At the conclusion of the show's credits, a tie-in website is announced: McKenna's All-Weather Haulage.

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