Domination & submission (BDSM)

Domination and submission (also known as Dominance and submission, D&s, Ds or D/s) is a set of psychosexual behaviors, customs and rituals relating to the dominance of one individual over another. It is considered part of the BDSM group of paraphilias. It should be noted that there are D/s relationships that exist outside of the BDSM community which are not referenced here.

Related Topics:
BDSM - Paraphilia

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D/s is often referred to as the "mental" side of BDSM, as no physical contact is required. D/s partners sometimes even conduct anonymous relationships over telephone, email or (more recently) instant messaging services. In other cases it can be intensely physical, sometimes traversing into sadomasochism.

Related Topics:
BDSM - Sadomasochism

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In D/s, one takes pleasure or erotic enjoyment out of either dominating or being dominated. Those who take the superior position are called Dominants, Doms (male) or Dommes (female), while those who take the subordinate position are called subs or submissives (male or female). Submissives generally outnumber Dominants, with male subs outnumbering Dommes by the widest margin, often three to one or more. "Dominatrix" is a term usually reserved for a female professional dominant who dominates others for pay. It should be noted that a Dominatrix is not a prostitute, and sexual services are not usually provided.

Related Topics:
Dominants - Submissives - Dominatrix - Professional dominant - Prostitute

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There can be any number of partners in a D/s relationship, with one Dominant sometimes having several subs, who may in turn dominate others. Relationships with multiple Dominants and a single submissive are rarer but still possible. Still the most common combination is a single Dominant and submissive, often in an ongoing committed relationship. Romantic love is not necessarily a feature in D/s, partners can be very much in love or have no romantic relationship at all.

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Variation in D/s (or BDSM for that matter) is virtually limitless and the activities take many forms, and may include servitude, verbal abuse, humiliation, consensual slavery and sexual slavery and may be combined with other forms of BDSM in myriad combinations. A classic example of D/s is "bootblacking", where one person polishes and lavishes attention on another's footwear as an expression of submission. Another is the Sissymaid, where an adult male dresses in cartoonish female clothing and performs stereotypical female chores such as houscleaning or serving tea.

Related Topics:
BDSM - Servitude - Humiliation - Sexual slavery - Stereotypical

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D/s participants often refer to their activity as "play", with an individual play session called a "scene".

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Some D/s relationships are sexual, others completely chaste. Fantasy role play can also be a part, with partners taking classic dominant/submissive roles such as teacher/student, police officer/suspect or parent/child. Animal Play, where one partner takes the role of owner/caretaker and the other takes the part of a pet or animal, can also be D/s play. Some people maintain a special room or area, called a Dungeon, which contains special equipment (shackles, handcuffs, whips, queening stools and spanking benches or a Berkley Horse, for example) used for play scenes, or they may visit a BDSM club that maintains such facilities.

Related Topics:
Animal Play - Dungeon - Shackles - Handcuffs - Whips - Queening stools - Spanking benches - Berkley Horse

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Consent is a vital element in all psychological play, and consent can be granted in many ways. Some employ a written form known as a "Dungeon negotiation form", for others a simple verbal commitment is sufficient. Consent can be limited both in duration and content. It's not unusual to grant consent only for an hour or for a evening. Some "contracts" can get quite detailed, especially if a scene is to last a weekend or more. Non-consensual D/s is considered abuse and not accepted by the BDSM community.

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